Open letter to owner of unleashed maltese

I'm sorry I yelled at you to get your maltese on a leash as he ran straight to my 2 shar-peis one trained to kill humans, her daughter leash-aggressive-just-spent-6-of-her-1st-8-months-being-abused. I wasn't kidding when I told you they can kill your dog in one bite.

Your dog


My dog


And my other dog


You see, as you get into your black Mercedes parked in the driveway of your home on 15th north of Montana, I know you won't react nicely to seeing your little baby's guts all over the sidewalk bloody and oosing all over your vuitton bag. And I'm an unemployed artist barely making ends meet so I'd prefer to not make you angry.

I'd also prefer to not be involved in the vicious death of a maltese.

or a wealthy woman witnessing the vicious death of her maltese.

or my dog euthanized for viciously killing your maltese.

See- THERE ARE REASONS FOR LEASH LAWS. It's not a mean mean big bad bully way of controlling you and your dog. It actually has some purpose. oh say, for example, to KEEP YOUR MALTESE ALIVE. Keep him from FROM CHARGING UP TO MY TIGHTLY LEASHED-BECAUSE-SHE'S-AGGRESSIVE SHAR-PEI. or RUNNING INTO IMPATIENT MONTANA BOULEVARD DRIVERS!

Notice I have my dogs on leashes. The young leash-aggressive one has no slack and I'm keeping her close to my hip. There's a reason for this. The older one is more stable, but goodness she does get riled up when her daughter is exploding. The big one is 60 pounds. And was a guard dog for a drug house downtown before she was rehabbed. She knows better than to attack, but if the situation calls for it, she's well trained and strong. very strong.



and yet, you and I both know when your dog is mauled by a shar-pei because you let him run amock on a public street and could not restrain him from charging into my dog.... well. you'll destroy us in your grief. You'll sue me- You'll have my dogs impounded and euthanized.

and yet, you and I both know YOU were the negligent parent.

I'm sorry I yelled at you- But I'd prefer to not be a unwilling participant in a murder. Please leash little poopy pants, would you? If he's not killed by a leash-aggressive Shar-pei, he'll be run over by a car. Please.